I Lost Her!

It has happened to me. I lost my child today for about 3.7 minutes. And it was the longest 3.7 minutes of my entire life. Seems even longer than the entire 106 days she was in the hospital.

Here's the scenario....

We were at the school picnic today and having a ball. They had Jumping Jacks and games and food. All in all it was a really nice set up that they put on. Matt and I were sitting with a couple of other parents on some blankets. Caitlyn was running back and forth to the games with some of her little friends. She was typically gone about 5 or less minutes each time. And everytime, I was able to see where she was at. Except for this one time.

She and Alexis were going to get face painting done and tatoos. Fine by me, I will see you in a few minutes. Just as we had been doing. I turned around to put some stuff back in our backpack or something. When I looked up, I couldn't see her and Alexis anymore. Now, I didn't freak out right away. I figured they were at the table getting painted on. So I told Matt, I was going to go over to the table to see her. I stood up to leave, and Alexis comes running back to the blanket.....WITHOUT Caitlyn. Now, I fucking freak out. I tell Matt to stay at the blanket so when she comes back someone is there. I go off to look for her at the face painting and tatoo table. No Caitlyn. I walk around the carnival once. No Caitlyn. Now, I am about to panic, but I stop and think of what I need to do before I lose control.

I see another little girl's father who knows me and Cate. And I ask him if he has seen her. He said no and immediately said that he would start looking. I also ask him to tell the other parents that I can't find her. Matt said he would start looking inside the school as the doors were open and the kids were allowed to go in and out.

Now is when I am about to lose control. All I can think is that these few hundred kids out on this playground is heaven for some sicko. But I refrain from panicking as I know that I can't do that if I am going to find this child quickly....and because I don't want to look like a complete ass in front of the entire school.

I go to the DJ and tell him that he needs to announce that Caitlyn should go to the swings. He tells me he will when the song is over. Yeah, that's not going to work for me but thanks for playing. So I tell him that she is only 4 years old and I can't find her that he needs to stop the song and do it now. He looked at me like I was crazy, but only for a brief moment. I think the tip off for him had something to do with the fact that my hands were clenched into fists?

So he makes the announcement. I look around for a couple more seconds then realize that I should probably go over to the swings in case she heard the announcement and heads over there.

Lo and behold. I go to the swings and there is my girl. Smiling at me cause she is excited that they said her name on the microphone. I quickly scoop her up and bathe her with kisses. And my heart finally stops pounding and I no longer feel the urge to cry hysterically. Turns out she was in the jungle gym and I couldn't see her in there. And of course, I realized later that it didn't occur to me to actually look in there in the first place.

Then I walk around so that I can let all of the people know that I have located her that were looking for her. I must say though, that the other parents were all over that shit with me and were scouring the playground looking for her. Which really made me feel good when it was over with.

Amazing how long those few minutes felt for me though. And I really hope that I never have to relive those few minutes ever again.

That's all she wrote

I am now officially considering the school year finished. I have run around all morning picking up equipment from 4 different schools. We are completely moved upstairs. Most of my boxes are unpacked. Now all I need to do is take inventory of all the equipment that we have in our library and I will be on summer vacation. Of course, I can't do inventory until I hook the computer up that the inventory software is on....but that is waiting until Monday.

Tomorrow is Caitlyn's school picnic and she is so very thrilled that both her mom and her dad are going with her. I was a little peeved about this whole picnic deal, but I am picking and choosing my battles. Turns out the kids can't attend unless they are accompanied by an adult. Which I can completely understand. However, on the calender, it is officially a school day, not a day off. So technically speaking, I should be allowed to take my child to school and leave her there as is the custom every other morning. But I won't argue. If anything, I am getting to take a day off work to hang out with my girlie and the husband. So it can't be all bad right?

Currently, Caitlyn is counting down the days to summer vacation with me....as well as the days to her birthday. Holy smoke this kid is going to be 5!!!! I am starting to get all weepy when I think about it now. And not for the reasons that I used to get all weepy. I used to think about how tragically her life began and how far she has come. Now I get all weepy because she is getting so big. And it seems like it is happening all so fast all of the sudden. This kid's first 2 years dragged ass. More than likely it was because she was in the infant stage for soooooo long having to catch up with everything. Once 2 hit, this child went into fast forward. And now when I hold her, I think of when she was little enough for her whole body to fit on my torso, or when she was little enough for me to carry around like a sack of potatoes. Not so much anymore.

The other day at my mom's house, she was all snuggly with Matt and giving him all kinds of loving. She couldn't get enough of his kisses and couldn't seem to get close enough to him. He was all smiley, naturally. I told him that he needs to hang on to this as soon enough this kid won't want him coming near her to even kiss her on the cheek.

Ahhh, waffling. Okay, off to find something to complete here at work. Maybe I will hook the computer up after all so that I don't feel as though I am doing nothing. Though that can't be all bad can it??

The Antichrist Part II

So I had the second meeting today that I thought was sure to be a complete nightmare because of The Antichrist, aka the Advocate. So all damn day I willed my child to fall on the playground at school and break an arm so I wouldn't have to go to this damn meeting. No such luck obviously, as this post is not called "Caitlyn Broke her Arm." So I go to the meeting, reluctantly, with the Assistive Tech Coordinator in tow. Because I was NOT going to be slandered by this woman. The whole point of this meeting was that it was called because the mom did not feel as though her son's AT needs were being met. And I figured if the Antichrist got word of that, then she was sure to be all over my ass. So I figured I would bring some back up.

Meeting starts, mom, dad, special ed coordinator, teacher, resource teacher, AT coordinator, and myself sit down. NO ADVOCATE! Turns out, the parents can't afford her anymore as they are paying for their son to get outside tutoring of sorts. Thank God in heaven!!!! And to be perfectly honest, the family is better off without her.

And needless to say, I feel like a jerk for willing my girl to break her arm....even though it didn't pan out that way :P

The First 90+ Degree Weekend of the Year

And a good time was had by all....especially Caitlyn. She couldn't get over to Grandma Linda's house fast enough on Saturday morning to spend the entire day in the pool. And she has the pink shoulders (sdespite loads of sunscreen) to prove it.

Sunday was spent all day in Grandma Rita's pool with dad. Mom got to stay home and enjoy the lonliness of the house. That was until Bobby, Donna, and Magee came over. Turns out their air conditioning was broken and they didn't want to spend the day sweltering in their place. Gee can't understand that?

And today, we all went back to Grandma Linda's to enjoy the pool once again. That was until the rain came in. But it made for a good excuse to get the kid out of there and home for a much needed bath. You would think that will all the pool time I have the cleanest kid around. But it is amazing how gross hair can become from chlorine and sunscreen.

Tomorrow will be the day of hell at work for me. It's like the last big day before the end of the school year hits. I have another IEP meeting with the Antichrist. Can't wait for that shit. After that, it's back to my office to complete the packing for the move that will be taking place on Wednesday. Once that is over, it should be smooth sailing to the 16th. And of course that date depends on my transition there. If not, then it is smooth sailing to the 30th. Either way, I am considering the year completed as of Wednesday.....no questions asked.

Oy!! The Questions!!!

Caitlyn has never really inquired much about certain things in her baby pictures. To her, every baby has wires and tubes sticking out of every hole in their body. It has never been an issue with her really. Until now that is. Suddenly she is very eager to know all about her entrance into this world. She is so intrigued about her start in life. We are constantly looking at pictures now and she ask about every.little.thing.in.each.picture.

It is very difficult to explain away some of the things that have happened to her in her short little life. However, I try to explain them in terms that she can understand (note, the explanations I have below, are really just my summations :P)

It seems like every question that I answer leads to another question for her.

The first question that she had was why she had to have a tube in her throat when she was a baby. She wanted to know if it was hard for her to breathe with it in there. Quite the contrary my love :P So I explained it to her, she needed the tube to help her breathe. And she was satisfied with this....for a while.

Next question, why is there a tube in my nose too mommy? Well, you were a piss poor eater and we had to get food into you somehow since you sucked at drinking a bottle. Satisfied....for about a week.

Then..."Mommy, why do I have scars on my hands and my leg?" Well, there are several explanations for those you see my dear. The hand scars, those are from all the pricks (and I don't mean doctors) that you required. The blood transfusions, the blood draws, the medications that we injected, etc. Now the one on your leg, that's a whole different story. See your skin was paper thin and well a mindless nurse pulled tape off a little to harshly, hence, ripping your skin off.

This leads us up to yesterday in the car when she about broke my heart. On the way to my mom's, "Mommy, why did they have to cut your belly to take me out?" Because mommy was basically dying, ogran after organ shutting down. And basically, it was because of the squirmy little fetus inside of me. She then says, "But it was too early for me to come out of your belly. Why didn't they leave me in longer?" Yes it was early. No they couldn't leave you in there any longer. Crying a little now, she says, "But I wanted to stay in there. Didn't you want me to?" Oh my love, more than you could ever imagine!!

So yesterday evening, she was sitting on the toilet peeing. And I hear her pleading with someone about something. I go to the door. And she is crying, and I mean crying. Saying to hersself,
"Why? I don't want them to cut my belly to take my baby! Please Mommy don't let them cut my belly open!" I am not sure who she was talking to, or why she was even having this conversation with the unknown person. But I do know that this subject is weighing so heavily on my little girl's mind and I can't fucking stand it!

Organized Sports and other things

I signed the girl up today for Pre K soccer. Not that I am a fan of soccer (I actually know pretty much nothing of the sport other than the intent is to kick the ball into the net). She is completely thrilled. And also hesitant and nervous about playing. She is terrinfied about what will happen if she doesn't make a goal. So that is something that I know we are going to have to work through. Practice starts in July and her first game is in mid August. Man oh man is she going to look adorable in that soccer unifrom though....which is my primary concern.

I went to visit some people at a couple of schools I used to work with today. Things seem to be worse than ever in that district which sucks for those employees. But hopefully it will get better for them. On this visit I realized one thing....I am OLD!!!! I say this because the receptionist that works in one of the buildings I met my second year going to this particular school. At the time, her daughter was in 8th grade, possibly 7th, but I am thinking 8th. When I saw her today I asked how her daughter was doing. Lo and behold, she has graduated college, and gotten married. Yeah...I thought maybe she was still in high school. Futile attempt at maintaining my own youth I suppose.

I have discussed a possible pay cut with Matt if I change positions. He is adamant that it can not be a significant one (well duh!). So now I anxiously await Monday to see what happens there.

Symmetry

Caitlyn is talking about symmetry these days. Seems they went over it in school about 2 weeks ago and she is still processing it I guess.

Cate: Mom, did you know our bodies are symmetrical?

Mom: What???

Cate: Our bodies are symmetrical. It means they are the same on both sides if you fold it in half.

Mom: (in complete shock of course) Wow! You are one smart little lady my love :)

In other news....
I am looking into reworking my contract at work. See, I think I am one of the few teachers on the planet that doesn't have the summers off. And I am not including teachers that opt to teach summer school or work summer camps at school or anything like that.

When I took this new position almost 2 years ago, I agreed to an 11 month contract. Cause at the time it really didn't seem so bad. (Don't ask me what the hell I was thinking, I'm not sure.) It still allowed me about 6 weeks off in the summer and time to take off around Christmas and Spring Break. But the downside is that I always have to make sure that I have enough days and worry about that. So there has been a big transition at my job and there are some openings. These openings would allow for me to move into the 10 month position and have the summers and other breaks off without having to worry about saving my vacation time and what not.

Seems like it is a no brainer conclusion right? Wrong. I would have to take a pay cut. Now, I haven't met with my boss to figure out exactly why I would have to take a pay cut when I am doing the same job. I think I am most confused by it because I am a salaried employee as opposed to an hourly employee. So I am not sure how all of that works into less pay for me.

Bottom line I guess is that I have to see how much of a pay cut that it is and go from there. Besides the issue of the pay cut, there are so many other things to take into consideration. Things like the teacher's retirement fund, putting myself back down on the totem pole and allowing myself to be riffed for the next 5 years, etc.

When I began thinking about this and talked to my boss about it a few months ago, the decision really did seem much easier to make! I am meeting with my boss next week to have everything laid out in front of me before I make my decision....let's just hope the pay cut isn't so drastic that I can't afford to make the move.

My Servant

When I was little, I can remember my mother saying to me that I was her slave. That she had children so that she would in fact have slaves. Now, I know she didn't mean this to be true (well mostly). And I have heard other moms refer to their kids as slaves. I think I may have even done it. Turns out, Caitlyn does think she's my slave.

Mom: Cate will you hand mommy her pop from the table?

C: Why can't you get it yourself?

M: Cause I asked you nicely to get it for me and I get things for you when you ask me to.

C: (bringing the can over to me reluctantly) You treat me like a servant!

And of course, the word servant as you and I say it, is not the way the girl says it. If you have ever heard her talk, you would swear that she is from the Bronx. So as the word servant came out of her mouth, I started to laugh hysterically. To which she screamed at me...

"Well you do and I don't like it!"

So now I am just waiting for the opportunity to throw that right back at her the minute she asks me for something ;) (man I need to start being nicer to this kid)

The time seems to have come

Matt is now actively pursuing a referral from our primary care physician to a urologist. That's right. He wants a vasectomy. Now most couples have lengthy discussions on whether or not to have the procedure done. Matt and I...there have been all of about 2 discussions (if that's what you really want to call them) regarding the procedure.

We have opposing opinions on it you see.

He wants to have one done pronto.

I want to wait....how long? No idea. But I don't think this is the decision that I want him to make.

And I say him, because he is basically saying it is up to him as an individual because there really is no middle ground on the issue. And I have to agree with him about that. Where is the compromise on "I want to try again" and "I don't ever want to try again."???? There isn't really. There is no way to meet in the middle. You either want another child or you don't.

Matt has very valid reasons for this. I won't deny him that. He is afraid of several things.
1. another miscarriage
2. another extremely premature birth
3. almost losing his wife and his unborn child yet again

I can't deny that those are very valid concerns.

I have very valis reasons for not wanting him to do it.
1. another pregnancy
2. another baby
3. a sibling for Caitlyn
4. a fucking pregnancy to not be yanked away from me mid stream or otherwise by the ever cruel Mother Nature.

Now the irony of it all is this...Matt's reasons for not wanting another child are the same as mine, while my reasons for wanting another child are the same as his reasons. The joke of it all is that there is no in between.

I was watching Caitlyn ride her bike last night. And it is amazing to me that only 5 years ago, I would have NEVER imagined her doing the things she does today or being the child that she is today. See those neonatologists are so very good at giving you the worst case scenario. Problem is they never give you the best case scenario to counteract that with. So you really believe the worst is going to be. So while I was watching it her it occurred to me...this may be what it is the plans for me. Maybe I am supposed to be Caitlyn's mom only.

Whenever the topic of another child arises within our family (mind you this is rare as no one every wants to upset me with this conversation) I always say to people "Why should I tempt fate again?" When in reality I am willing to look that bitch square in the face and tell her to bring it! But it's true, why should I tempt fate? I got so so so damned lucky with Cate. There is no denying that for all intents and purposes she is not the norm for a 25 weeker. (Possibly a tad earlier as doctors don't believe that she was quite 25 weeks yet.) We have managed to avoid any of the landmines that could have ended in "the worst case scenario." There are no guarantees that the 3 of us will be as lucky if we were to try again. Maybe that was the first sign that I was only supposed to be Cate's mom???

I wonder often what is the lesser of 2 evils...not being able to get pregnant at all or having your body crap out on you and not allow you to carry a baby???? I mean, obviously neither of the choices are really all that appealing. But seriously, what's worse? If I hadn't been able to get pregnant at all, I wouldn't know what I was so robbed and cheated of. But I have had the amazingness (so not a word) of carrying a pregnancy more than half way through a pregnancy. So what in the hell right do I have to gripe about when some women can't even get that? I've had the pleasure of announcing pregnancy 3 times to family and friends, despite only having one child to show for it. Some women aren't granted that one little pleasure in life. On the flipside, I've also had to tell family and friends that I've miscarried, oh and I have miscarried yet again. If I'd not been able to get pregnant, I wouldn't have had to do that. Fucking double edged sword.

If Caitlyn had not been our first child, and we had an uneventful pregnancy the first go round, I assure you there would be at least one more little Walsh on this planet for me to blog about. But she was our first, and I thank God for her every single day, don't get me wrong. But if that pregnancy hadn't gone so terribly awry, would Matt and I ever even needed to think twice about another pregnancy? I doubt it. But again, Mother Nature is a bad jokster when she really puts her mind to it.

There are positives to him having this done I suppose.
1. I can have sex whenever the hell I want to without having to think quick what the date is and how many days it has been since my last period before running and grabbing a condom.
2. The money saved on all those boxes of condoms will allow us a night out for some good grub once a month too :P
3. Caitlyn will benefit from being the only child (all those rumours about how maladjusted only children are are finally coming to be disproved)
4. I never have to go through all that baby business again...no more diapers, I will NEVER have to potty train another child, no more bottles, no more sleepless nights, no more teaching toddlers that they really MUST hold the railing on the stairs to avoid injuries just short of requiring hospitalization.

The positive list could go on and on and on. But, the negative list really is so short. However, those 4 little negatives I listed somewhere up there...well they far outweigh any of those positives.

Seems to me like a vicious fucking circle. No matter how much I try to convince myself of the positives, I keep hearing the words "no more children" in the back of my head. And to be perfectly honest, that hurts more than I could have ever imagined it would have.

I think my biggest beef with all of this is that it's not me making the decision based on my age or financial situation or any of that. The decision is basically being made for me because my body craps out when it comes to pregnancy. And I think if I can wrap my head around the fact that there is a huge possibility of it happening again then I will be ok with it.

This has got to be my longest entry ever...see what happens when I start waffling about personal shit. Just be thankful you aren't sitting next to me because you would certainly be in for the long haul of about 5 hours worth of my rambling. All to return to the same conclusion that today I don't want him to have it done, but tomorrow I will.

I will stop now, in case I am boring my 4 readers to tears. But rest assured I will be revisiting this topic....I can hear you all applauding about that shit.

This is a gem

This little goodie was given to me by Worry Woman yesterday....so glad that people think of me :)

The Antichrist

I have met her. There is no doubt in my mind. She was disguised as an advocate at an IEP meeting I attended on Wedsnesday. Had to be the nastiest, ugliest, meanest woman that I have ever encountered in my life.

Now don't get me wrong, I have nothing against advocates in the IEP process. Matter of fact, I actually believe that any parent who has a child in special education should have one. And they shouldn't have to pay out of their own pockets for them. The special education maze can sometimes be enough to send me over the edge and I have had training and experience in it. I can't even begin to imagine what it does to the parent that has no prior experience with it and no prior knowledge of how things work with it.

That being said....this woman should NOT be allowed to be an advocate. It is one thing to come into a meeting to advocate (hence their titles) for what is best for the child at hand. It is completely another to do nothing but badmouth, bitch and moan, and complain about the staff working with this child. For the most part, the team is doing what they know to do for the kid. Yes there could be improvements, but there always could. And coming in ranting and raving like a lunatic as opposed to asking for x,y, and z will get you nowhere with this team.

At one point, she was actually questioning what qualifications and training the resource teacher had. Now correct me if I am wrong, but having been hired by the school district 2 years ago, she was already checked to make sure that she met the district's standards. The fact that she didn't meet the standards of this advocate is what was amazing to me.

At one point, she actually accused the resource teacher and reading specialist of falsifying the results on the most recent testing they had conducted on this child. They were convinced that there was no way he could have made as much progress as he did. Now correct me if I am wrong, but isn't that the whole fucking purpose of the supports that are in place for him??? To make these amazing gains??? And they accused the team of having their expectations set too low, yet they are the ones questioning how he was able to make that much progress. Doesn't sound to me like their expectations are all that high either.

One of the most ironic things that I saw during the meeting was that when I spoke to mom on the phone in the weeks prior after completing my own evaluation, she was pleasant and responsive to me. Yes she had some concerns and frustrations, but what parent doesn't? However, this advocate opened her mouth and all these atrocities and accusations started flying about, and all it took was that little fire under mom's ass and she became a crazed lunatic as well.

The saddest part of the meeting....the fact that over 2 hours into it, NOTHING was resolved. Nothing in this child's programming had changed (and I'm not so sure that it really needed to), none of their concerns were met with resolution. The only thing that came out of it, was that now the entire team is scrambling to make sure that this kid has anything and everything available to him. Most of which he doesn't even need. But of course, the district is so terrified of due process that they will do anything to avoid it, no matter the costs.

It's days like this that I really hate my job. Most of the time, I really enjoy what I do. For the most part, I have it pretty easy when it comes to my job. Then you run into the devil incarnate and she makes you doubt what you do! Damn woman...she is evil and needs to be destroyed!

Housekeeping

I have neglected to respond to any of my comments that I have gotten....even when they were posed as questions. So here goes.

Shawnee wanted to know where I got the Hello Kitty Bedding from. Target of course ;) And yes, it most certainly looks like the walls have been covered in Pepto Bismol. I take absolutely no offense to that at all.

The dog was not trying to hump Caitlyn. He was jumping up on her with his paws on her chest to lick her face. If he had tried to hump my child, I might have gone just a little ape shit over it. Shawnee, I told my mom want you said to do about me calling the house and just keep saying my name over and over again. And well she had a few choice words for you, and also added that would be willing to hunt you down and harm you if she had to listen to this dog barking all day long.
But on a scarier note...I was looking at my little traffic report the other day. And because of this very post, someone who searched "woman fucking her dog" actually came across my blog. And the fact that they hung out and read a few pages gives me the willies to be perfectly honest. So not that I posted about a woman fucking her dog, but because those 4 words, in that specific order, were in the post about the humping dog, they found me. And now, after this paragraph, I can only imagine the visits I will get since technically I am talking about a woman fucking her dog.

The scissors ... well I am really waiting for the day that she cuts her hair. I know it will be coming soon. Matter of fact, she has already tried to cut MY hair with the stupid things. So it really is only a matter of time now.

The Easter Bunny's travel route is nowhere to be found on the internet. I was able to find where Santa was over Christmas, but the Easter Bunny....well he's obviously nowhere near as popular as the fat guy in the red suit.

Yes, Shawnee, I do love me a Cadbury Egg, but only one a year and around Easter. I didn't get one this year :(

And thanks for giving me warm and fuzzies about my child not wanting to be at home anymore. I do know that it's only because of Kelly and the other kids on the block. Add that to the fact that my mother gives her any damn thing that she wants, and it's a pretty good place to be. Kari I would love to come and have a sleepover with you :) But I can't promise an all out hissy fit....but if there are margaritas involved, I am sure that there is a pretty good chance of it LOL.

The Pizza Guy has gotten some reprieve from my child's vulgarities. If you ask her to say it, she won't. If you ask her what she used to say to him, she won't. Now when she hears someone say the F word, she very quickly brings it to their attention that they have spoken a bad word....

Person: "Get the fuck out!"

Caitlyn: "Mommy, fuck is a bad word right?"

So although we are not there just yet, it is progress in my eyes.

She doesn't want to live here anymore

She hasn't come right out and said it. But the girl has been at my mom's house 5 out of the 7 last nights. What is wrong with that picture? I suppose I could say yeeeeehaw that Matt and I are getting as much alone time as we are, nto to mention the fact that I have watched some TV shows uninterrupted. But it's getting a little crazy now when I say we are going home and she cries and cries that she wants yet another sleepover.

I am thinking it has something to do with the fact that Kelly lives there now and they spend all day outside playing together in the beautiful weather that we are having. When you weigh that against coming to her own house where the closest person to her age is her parents, it doesn't seem so strange.

Where can I go and have a sleepover and cry when it comes to coming home?

Only in my world

Yesterday I went shopping for all of the goodies for the Easter Basket for the girl and the cousins. I also picked up the little box of Paas tablets to color the eggs. That event was scheduled for tonight. At 8 o'clock to be exact.

I was right on schedule. House cleaned, dinner eaten, ready to color eggs.

Matt opens the box.....the sealed box.....it's fucking empty. Nothing in it! Not one single little tablet.

Off to the store he went to get a new one, and of course he comes home with one that is far more complicated involving stickers and springs, suction cups and hats for the eggs. I will post pics of them at some point, cute, but a pain in the ass none the less.

Here's some Caitlyese for the day...

Before bed she asked me,

"Mommy can you get on the computer to find the Easter Bunny's schedule to see if he is heading to my house right now."

Love this immediate gratification generation. We had no idea when the damn bunny or santa was showing up when we were kids. Our parents probably put our asses to bed at 6:30 because they told us these characters wouldn't come until we were fast asleep. And there was no way for us to check up on that, we just had to believe them.

The Jelly Bean Contest

We've all seen them. The huge jars filled with jelly beans and you have to guess how many jelly beans are actually in the jar. Now I have never been able to guess how many stupid beans are in the thing. I have never even come close.

They had a jar of jelly beans at Caitlyn's school. All of the kids were encouraged to make a guess. The prize would be a Cadbury Egg (completely worth the guess in my book) and a gift certificate for a local pizza place. So quite a few kids from the school made their guesses. Kids in ages ranging from pre kindergarten (Caitlyn's class) up through 8th grade.

Well, she and Matt are now on spring break, so they were home on Friday. Matt gets a call from her teacher. Guess what??? She won the freakin jelly bean contest.

Now the funny thing is, Caitlyn has no conceptualization of any number over 100. I don't really think that she even knows that numbers that high exist. So when they asked her for her guess, she said to them "60 70." The teacher wrote down 6,070. Another student behind her heard her guess and said 60 80. Again, the teacher write down 6,080. So out of all those kids, two 4 year olds won the prizes :P

Want to know how many jelly beans were in there????

6,049

Child Proof my ASS!!!

Caitlyn loves using scissors. She will cut just about anything that she can get her little fingers on. So we have had the discussion on more than one ocassion about what she is allowed to cut.....paper only. And we haven't had this conversation because she doesn't abide by this rule. It is only because I want to make sure that it is always fresh in her memory when she picks the things up.

Last night, she took her scissors up to her room. And came back down with her doll....her now almost bald doll. So I didn't ream her out, because really where is the harm in a little hair cutting ....hair of the doll that is.

She goes back up with the scissors. A few minutes later I hear her crying. I run up there, and she is screaming that she cut herself with her scissors. I assume it's Caitlyn being the drama queen that we all know that she can be. She shows me her hand and sure as shit, she really did cut herself. Right between her thumb and index finger, you know, that little floppy piece of skin.

So beware, those little scissors with the rounded egdes...not so child proof in my book.

Doggie Style

What I am about to post really isn't nearly as offensive as the title, however, it is so very fitting. The weather today was absolutely gorgeous. So I decided to get this child out of the house since she has been couped up for so long. We played on the porch blowing bubbles, drew with sidewalk chalk, played hopscotch, then as it started to get darker, I told her that we could go for a walk and she could take her scooter or her bike. She decided on the bike.

We get about a block away and she can't go any farther. This is in part due to her small stature, but also due to the fact that the poor girl doesn't have the muscle tone or endurance and strength to go any farther. That damn prematurity thing rears it's ugly head when you least expect it I tell ya!

So of course, I carry the bike back and she runs back to the house. Then we decide to just walk...both of us. We go about a mile and on the way back, we encounter a nice gentleman with a very small dog. Naturally, Caitlyn decides to stop and pet the dog. Well, the dog jumps up and puts it's paws on her chest wanting to lick her face to death. She giggles and runs to me and tells this man....

"He humped me like Rudy humps my Mommy!!"

And she is thoroughly excited about this. The man kind of looks at me, snickers, and says, "Have a nice night." And goes about his own walk.

Now I am mortified because this man probably went home and told his wife about some weirdo woman that allows her small child to watch while she engages in sick sexual play with someone named Rudy.

Little does he know, Rudy is in fact my mother's dog. And the fucking dog humps me everytime I set foot in her damn house. Which of course my mom and Caitlyn, and everyone else in the damn house for that matter, thinks is just the funniest thing that they have ever seen.

This dog has it something terrible for me. If my mother calls me on the phone, all she has to do is say my name and the dog goes apeshit barking like crazy running around the house looking for me. When I won't pay attention to him when I am there, meaning I am not letting the heavy bastard lay on my lap, he is walking around the house barking at me or looking to chew something up.

Well of course, when I called my mom, she thinks this is the funniest thing she has heard all day. Says my name, and the dog goes nutso in the background.

And my poor child now finds nothing wrong with a dog humping her mother???? (Side note, the dog on teh street did not hump my child, I would have stopped that shit immediately.)

Damn dog...why can't Matt be as attentive???

The first night in the bed

Well, I think it went pretty well. We have hardwood floors throughout the house, so every single noise can be heard. For about 45 minutes after Caitlyn got into bed, I could hear her getting in and out of the bed. Seems to me that she thinks needing the step stool for it really is a load of fun. But she managed to stay in there all night until about 6am. Then she made her way into bed with me for the remainder of the time that we had left to sleep...all 60 minutes of it. But that is something that she has always done. Seems she has a radar that lets her know that Matt is out of the bed and she needs to fill that space LOL.

We are having a splendid time on Spring Break, despite the fact that we don't have it at the same time. The nice thing about having it at different times is that I get a couple of hours in the morning to run errands and just hang out by myself. And I really enjoy that, since it's something that I don't get much. The one major downfall, is that I don't get to sleep in at all cause I have to be up to get her ready and off to school. But she is off on Friday, so I will that day :)

Tomorrow she has her spring pictures at school and she is wearing the cutest yellow dress. (I know I am biased, but really, she is so darn cute in it.) So when those come in, I will throw them up here for your viewing pleasure. After I pick her up and run her home to get changed, we are going to hang out and the mall. Now she wants to pull some money out of her piggy bank and buy herself some Hello Kitty posters. So I told her that we would go to Claire's and she could pick out some HK stuff for her room. We'll probably eat there as well...cause that's what Americans do, shop and ruin their credit and over indulge on mall food making them obese. But that is a post for another time I suppose LOL

And I finally got the canopy up. With no help from Matt I might add. He refused to put a hook in the ceiling. We have plaster walls and that makes hanging anything much more difficult. So I ran to Walgreens (firstly for the cream to help cure the itching issue I have going on) and picked up one of those 3M hooks that are sticky. Not sure if that's going to hold it up there, but we'll see. If it doesn't then I will just hang the damn hook up there myself and not even tell him. Chances are he wouldn't notice it until she moves out of the bedroom anyway.

It's here!!!

It has arrived and is now all set up, minus the canopy. I have to go get a hook for the ceiling for that. Caitlyn couldn't be more thrilled about it. She loves it and has spent all afternoon up there (added bonus for me not having to fight for the computer with her). She couldn't run out of the door at school fast enough to set it all up and even bypassed the opportunity to go to the McDonald's playland for lunch so that we could come home and set it up.



And just to note how wonderful she thought it was, she took a nap in it in pure Caitlyn form ;)

Tomorrow is the big day

The room is cleaned and the bed frame is waiting for the new matresses. Once they are here tomorrow, they will set them up for me. Now I am debatting whether or not to get everything ready for her and surprise her or wait for her to get home to put it all up with me. After having to clean the room out with her home tonight, I am thinking it may be easier to do it while she is gone. But I know how excited she is about having it all done, so waiting for her help may be the way to go.

In other news, I went for my annual with the girlie doc today. All is well with the bits and pieces with the exception of a little bit of Vulvar Dystrophy. Sounds horrid right??? Well, basically it is fancy medical terminology for I am itching like a mad woman and wreaking havoc on my own bits and pieces. Nothing that a little cortisone shouldn't clear up in about 3 months.....yes! 3 months!!! Now, I would doubt her about that, but again, she was pretty much dead on with the recovery time for shingles, so I am going to have to assume that she is also correct on this one as well. Unfortunately.

Will post some pics of the room after it's all ready :)

Woooooohooooooo

As of 3pm this afternoon I will be on Spring Break!!! Counting down the hours here. Tomorrow I am chapperonning a field trip with the girl to the zoo. Which shoudl be loads of fun considering it is going to be a whopping 38 degrees tomorrow. I'm sure that will make all of the animals come right on out for us to stare at them. The one good thing is that they got so many responses from the parents, that you are only responsible for your child plus one other. And that I am all about ;)

From the big girl bed, to an even bigger girl bed

Caitlyn has one of those fancy smancy (not really a word?) cribs that converts from a crib to a toddler bed to a full bed. Well, she has been in the toddler bed phase of it for about 2 years now. In the recent months, she has begun falling out of her bed. The reason is trifold....

1. She is too damn long for this bed being her ginormous 44 inch self

2. The kid loves to sleep on the very edge of the bed; always has, even used to snuggle up to the plexiglass of the incubator (doesn't sound enticing to you and I, but she loved it right along with burying her face...vent tube and all...into the bedding)

3. The insane amount of stuffed animals that have taken up residency on her toddler bed.

Numbers 1 and 2, I take no issue with. It is the number 3 reason that really pisses me off. If this kid would allow me to do something, anything, with the 47 friends on her bed, we may have been able to stay in this bed for a few more months. But you see, they have to stay in the bed. Otherwise they get cold, or lonely, or a myriad of other reasons that she comes up with when questioned about the damn things.

So last night, Matt and I with Caitlyn in tow went to go buy the full size matress and box spring for her new "Even Bigger Girl Bed" as we are referring to it in the house. Luckily we were able to snatch up a set that was on clearence as a floor model. So what would have been a near $1600 purchase (with tax, delivery, and bed frame) only ended up costing just over $700. Not too bad for a bed that will hopefully last this child until she moves out of my house.

This weekend we will be doing some shopping her and I. Grabbing some new bedding and pillows and other fun stuff for the new bed that will be arriving next Tuesday. Luckily, she asked me this morning if she could keep her room pink with princesses....damn straight girlie. Cause that means no painting and redecorating for me :)

And the kciker of it all....

"Mommy, now my stuffed animals will have even more room when they sleep with me."

Damned stuffed animals...I am thinking that we need to stage a kidnapping to get them all the hell out of my house. Anyone willing to drive the get away car?

Bad bad bad bad blogger

Yes I know I have been neglectful. Kari was very quick to point that out to me. So Kari, here is an entry, a nice looooong one just for you :P

Things have been busy in the land of the Walshes. Yet it seems as though we haven't gotten much accomplished. How in the hell does that happen?

Sunday was my birthday and a fabulous time was had by all. Caitlyn woke me up, after letting me sleep in, with a birthday card for me. Made me a little weepy as she wrote "MOM" on the outside of the envelope. She was so very excited about that she could hardly contain herself. She then insisted that I get out of bed promptly as there were many more surprises waiting for me downstairs. And indeed there were....

Matt got me flowers, which happens on a rare ocassion. He also got me an onion bagel (my favorite). In case I wasn't in the mood for that, he bought chocolate donettes (yes they are already gone and have been for a couple of days now). And to be even safer, there was a cheese danish on the counter for me. Basically he was covering all of his bases. Knowing that I can be somewhat fickle (he calls it crabby) in the morning, he wanted to make sure that whatever I wanted to eat for breakfast was there for me. What a guy :)

Then we dropped the girl off at my mom's to play with Kelly. We went to a matinee (read cheap) to see Failure to Launch. Cause who doesn't want to see Matt??? He is so on my list, though it isn't laminated LOL. Then we went to dinner at the Macaroni Grill. I am convinced that this is my new favorite restaurant. And I only discovered it about 2 months ago. And I am so glad that I did. They have great food there.

So here is my Caitlyn funny....

Last night we were playing inher bedroom. She wanted me to be the daughter while she was the mom. She was in her little kitchen making me dinner, soup. Everytime that she would ask if I like something that she was going to add, I would tell her no, just like she does to me. Her response...

"Well you have to eat it hunny cause it is good for you."

Now why is it when I say that to her, it doesn't matter???? So when I insisted I wasn't going to eat it, she started wagging her index finger at me telling me I had to. Know why?

"When I wave my finger at you like this hunny you HAVE to do it."

Really? Is that all it takes to get a kid to eat a decent meal? Man oh man have I been going about this the wrong damn way for a couple of years.

So I was given turkey, ketchup, mustard, corn, peas, tomato sauce, and hot dog soup. I think I may have to add it to the list of recipies to try. Along with a can of Sprite.

She asked me a few times to be the mom and I told her I didn't want to. That she could be the mom since technically, I am always the mom. After arguing with me she yells out...

"I don't want to be the mom!!! I hate being the mom!!!"

Welcome to my world on a bad day with you kid!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Update on the f word....yes it has slipped a few times. BUT, I am so much better! I have even stopped myself from saying it on several ocassions. I am even managing to type it less when the gals and I are chatting on messenger. The funny thing is, now I am realizing how much Matt says it. I think I will need to have a little chat with him about that ;) I can now you know, cause it won't make me a hypocrite LOL

And it hasn't fell from Caitlyn's lips since the Pizza Hut incident.

I have given up...

The F word for lent. Yes.

About 12 hours and counting.

I have only uttered it twice today and that was in telling the story to my boss as to why I am giving it up. But other than that, it has not left my lips. I have thought it. Don't get me wrong, I have thought it at least 10 times today. But it never fell out.
Now here's what I need from you....

Does typing it count, or am I allowed to still do that? I am thinking that I should be able to since the girl won't be able to hear me right???

STOP THE INSANITY!!!!!

The F Word must go. Forever. No questions asked.

So we were doing pretty well, not having heard from the pizza guy in a few days. Even when he was "on" her phone, she would simply hang up and move on to the next person to answer the phone.

Matt is out of town, so I decided to take Caitlyn out for dinner. Just her and I. Thinking it would be something nice for her. And it was. She loves hanging out with mom. But you see, I made one very very very fatal mistake. It was my choice in restaurants. For God's sake, I live in Chicago. There are a million and one places to go to for dinner. And what do I choose? Pizza Hut. What in the hell was I thinking. The pizza guy episode is still so very raw in this child, I totally should have known better than this. Really....I am smarter than this. But why oh why wasn't I tonight?????

You can completely see where I am going with this right?

The evening started out perfectly fine. No mention of the pizza guy and the obscenity to go along with it. Maybe because we had a female waitress, so the "guy" was far from her mind. We eat our food, she stuffs her face just like she always done at Pizza Hut.

Then....out of nowhere...it happens.

"Hey ya fuckin pizza guy!!!"

OH.MY.GOD!!!!

Wanting to crawl under the table, I am silently praying that that so did not just happen. But it did. When I lift my head from praying, my 3 shades of red head, I take a quick inventory to see who is gawking at us. And with good reason too. I mean, how often is it that you get to hear a 4 year old shouting such atrocities? Surprisingly, no one, not a single person is looking at us. For a breif moment I think it didn't happen. That it was all in my head and I was fearing it happening. But the fact that Caitlyn screeched it when she said it, I don't think it was clear to others what she had said. Audible, hell yes, but not clear enough for them to make out what vulgarities she is capable of when pissed off enough.

Then to confirm to me that she had said it, she says to me....

"Mommy did you hear what I said?"

And with that, I see her mouth open, almost in slow motion, and she is about to yell it again to make sure that I heard her. I was able to stop her this time. Which I am absolutely postive had I not stopped her, it most definitely would have warranted a call to DCFS by the management. I mean, who really lets their child yell this shit out, and in public no less??

So upon returning home, we had the talk that we had some time ago about how there are words that we say and words that we don't. And there are words that adults can use that children just aren't allowed to. Yes I am resorting to the old, "Because I am the mom that's why!" And I don't care. If it stops my child from using profanity in public, or for now, I am all about it.

I say again, and damn I am getting awfully tired of sayin git, the vernacular in this house needs to change....and right quick!

The Poor Pizza Guy

I don't know what my child has against the pizza delivery guy. All of the sudden she thinks that he is a lazy guy who apprearently doesn't know how to do his job. So here is the scene as it unfolded at my house the other night....

Mom is on computer (I know shocker!)

Caitlyn is playing on the couch with her toy phone that she can call 911 with. See, I figured I wanted her to be successful in preschool so I would teach her the damn number. Well, the toy would teach it to her, I would just explain when she is allowed to call them from the real phone.

...this toy phone also calls other people, like the little boy down the street, the librarian, the teacher, and of course, the pizza guy.

I hear Caitlyn talking to a few of the fun people in the phone and she is having a grand time with it.

Then....the poor pizza guy picks up. And I hear my child scream in a voice that paralled that of Linda Blair as she is being overtaken by satan himself. And it's not so much the voice that frightened me. Don't get me wrong, it was bone chilling and horrifying, but what came out of her mouth is now seared on my brain forever.

Screaming...."Wake up ya fuckin pizza guy!!"

And over and over and over she screams this. Everynow and again she slams the phone down in disgust. But then she picks the receiver right back up and calls the guy again. Only to yell this disturbing sentence at him once again.

I say again....the vernacular in the house MUST change now!

What is with this kid and toilets?

Some time ago, I posted about Caitlyn falling into the toilet. Not once, but twice. Our toilet issues have resumed. But not in the ways of potty training. We have now reached the stage where we are pretty much potty trained completely. Yes, there are times that we hold our BM's a little too long still. But nowhere near as bad as it used to be requiring a suppository and a lot of heartache on both ends. Instead, she just has experiences with the toilet that I fear are going to scar this poor child for life.

Typically, Caitlyn will get up once a night and go to the bathroom. That is, if she hasn't gone right before bed. Under normal circumstances, I thank my luck stars that she does this. There are a lot of kids that don't wake up from the urge to go. So I know that it is a blessing that she does this. Now, when she wakes up and goes to the bathroom, it usually wakes me up. And all I ever do is just listen for the tinkling in the toilet, and the closing of her bedroom door signifying that all is well.

Last night, or early this morning, I hear her go into the bathroom. I listen intently for the trickle. A sound that never comes. Then I hear slight whimpering. So I call to her to ask if she is okay. (I don't always go in right away cause then she seems to think it's close to the time when she has to get up and wants to chat for a bit.) She doesn't answer my calls. Then I hear all out crying. It is at this point that I assume that she has had an accident in bed. So I get up to clean her up and clean up the bed.

When I enter the bathroom, her pj pants and panties are around her ankles and she is crying. I ask her if she had an accident in her bed and she tells me no. So I attempt to pull up her pants, only to find them soaked. I assume she is still half asleep and doesn't remember the accident. So I take off her pants and tell her to come on in the bedroom while I change the bedding and get clean clothes on her. To my surprise, her bed is dry. It is then that the truth starts to unfold before my very eyes.

I ask her if she has to go pee and she tells me that she already did. Well, obviously, I have the piss ladden pants in my hands to prove it.

The poor girl sat down on the toilet to go. However, she forgot to pull her pants down first. And in her slumbered stupor, she couldn't for the life of her figure out how the hell she had the accident. In her mind, she went on the toilet like she is supposed to.

And of course, this morning, she has no recollection of it whatsoever.

Male or Email

So Caitlyn decided yesterday that she wanted to be a doctor. Makes me happy. However, I know that this choice will change a gazillion times before she actually does "become" something. We get home from mom's and right away she wants to play doctor with me. So we get the little doctor's kit that she has and we start playing.

She wants to be the patient first, so I get to be the doctor. There is a little clip board in her kit that has a bunch of questions on it to ask the patient. One of them is whether or not they are male or felmale. So I ask Caitlyn if she is a boy or a girl. She obviously says girl. Then I tell her that there are other names for boys and girls. Boys are males and girls are females. She understands this and says she is a female.

Then it's my turn to be the patient. She picks up the clip board and starts asking me the questions. Then she asks me if I am a boy or girl. I obviously say girl. Then pose the question to her, What is the other name for a girl?

"A boy is a male and a girl is a .....(insert long pause for her to reach into her memory)..... a girl is an email."

Children's movies

Taking a child to the theater is always an experience. Caitlyn actually really enjoys it. And she manages to sit through the entire movie, provided it peaks her interest.

Last night I took Kelly and Caitlyn to see Curious George. $19.00 just to enter the theater, and another $18.00 to get popcorn and pop. Sickens me how damn expensive it is to just go watch a movie. How in the hell is a family of say 5 or 6 supposed to go watch a movie???

After purchasing the food, we look for 3 seats. Kelly sits down, I start getting the straws in teh cups and doling out the goods. Caitlyn starts crying. Why? Well because she isn't heavy enough for the damn seat. The stupid thing keeps folding up on her. Now this happened when we went to see Madagascar, and I stupidly thought that maybe my child had put on enough weight by now that she would be able to sit alone this time around. No such luck, I would have a 35 pound 4 year old on my lap for an hour and a half, and the big ol melon of said 4 year old in front of my face the entire movie.

So we get settled into 3 seats, even though we only need 2, near the back of the theater (in case of any urgent bathroom trips or any other emergency that could rear it's ugle head) we are good to go and we wait for the movie to start. And we wait. And we wait. Oh and then we waited a little more. What in the name of all that is holy is with all the damn comercials. And I don't mean previews. I mean commercials. Commericals for Coke, commercials for cell phones. You know...all things that are relevant to the 3-10 year old population. After the commercials, then we make it to the previews. Which those I don't mind so much. And neither do most kids. They are all too busy yelling "I want to see that!!!."

Caitlyn wasn't too thrilled with the movie either. Half way through she started to get antsy. She wants to stand, she wants to talk. The movie just wasn't grabbing her. As an adult, I empathize with this reaction. Cause the movie isn't enjoyable for adults like Madagascar or Toy Story. It's completely geared towards kids. Which is fine, if you're 5, it's hell if your 31.

Now I could keep Caitlyn under control. Rubbing her head, whispering sweet nothings into her ear. All things that could keep her occupied for a good hour. What I couldn't control, was the asshole snoring in the row in front of me. Now, I understand, it's Friday, you have worked all week, the last thing you really want to do is sit through Curious George. But come the fuck on??? Now people are looking at him, not really snickering as it is completely annoying. But not a one gets up to ask him to stop. Well, not a one of them. Me on the other hand...I can't stand my husband snoring in the same room as me, I'll be damned if I am going to tolerate a perfect stranger doing it. So I kindly get up, creep over to him, tap him on the shoulder (to which he startles fiercly, and sweetly ask him if he could keep the snoring to a minimum as some kids are having trouble hearing the movie. A bit of a stretch, but I don't give a shit. he looks at me with a very befuddled look on his face and says......can you guess??? They all say it. "I wasn't snoring ma'am." Now I hear people giggle, well women do cause they have all heard this line before. And I kind of giggle too. And I say to him, "Oh good, then I won't have to come over and ask you to stop anymore." And I walk back to my set. And there is no more snoring for the duration of the film.

But a good time was had by both of the girls. Then they came to my house for a sleepover. Which entailed more crappy food, some arguing, playing loudly, some arguing. And it ended with both of them in my bed at about 2am.

Happy Friday

I am grateful that my child is smart...but sometimes it can really be an annoyance. Yesterday when I picked her up from moms, she doesn't even say hi to me. Instead, the first thing out of her mouth is that it is February 9th and tomorrow (today) will be February 10th, which means we can go see Curious George. Because about a month ago when we saw the previews I told her that I would take her and Kelly to see it. Did I think that she would be counting down the days? Hell no. But appearently she is. So here it is Friday morning, and the first thing she says is not good morning mother I am thankful for another day. No. What time are you picking me up at grandma's so that we can go to the movies?

Will let you know how it is....I have no desire to see the silly monkey and the man in the yellow hat. But alas! I will do it. I wanted to wait until Sunday when we could go to a matinee and it is cheaper, but for some reason she just doesn't understand the concept of the "cheaper" shows yet. I must teach her.

Vocabulary

Our vocabulary is booming these days. And luckily, it's not just with the words that shall not be mentioned. The things that are coming out of this child's mouth the past few weeks is unbelievable to me.

While playing with her doll....
"Look at her hair mommy. Do you like it? Isn't it stylish?"

When telling me about something she did at school....
"We were talking about dinsosaurs. They are extinct now. Do you know what that means mommy? It means there aren't any more here."

In general conversation while telling me about anything.....
"Do you understand that or do youe need me to explain it mom?"

When eating an ice cream last night....
"This is scrumptious mom."

I mean really??? When in the hell did this kid get so smart. And even yet, who is teaching it to her, cause it sure as hell isn't me? Some teacher I am I suppose :P

The Report Card

So the girl did an amazingly wonderful job on her report card. I am in awe that they even give them out to kids who are in preschool to be perfectly honest. And the most shocking thing to me is that the skills that are on it, are things that were on my kindergarted report card. So much more is expected of kids these days. There are actually prerequisites to entering kindergarten. Which I guess I can understand to a certain extent.

The are that I live in are predominantly 2 income households, as are the areas surrounding me. So I assume that the majority of children around here attend preschool or a daycare type preschool. So it is only natural that they learn these things. That's not to say that there aren't stay at home or work at home moms in my neighborhood. They are out there, I have seen them. So if these are parents that don't realize what the prerequisites are for their children come school age, what happens to them upon entering kindergarten? Since technically a child doesn't have to be enrolled in school until they are 6 years old. Though I don't know that I have run across any families out there that keep their children out of school that extra year. But I know they must exist right? What happens to these kids who don't "meet the requirements?" Do they recieve special help right off the bat? Or do the teachers hope that they will catch up to the children who attended school settings?

Anyhow...

So the report card was fabulous. In the majority of skills, shse recieved "R", meaning that she performs the skills on a regular basis. She recieved some with an "S" to indicate that she demonstrates the skill sometimes. And then there was the "N" category. These are skills that she has yet to acquire. There were 4 (I think, I have signed and returned the thing already prompt parent that I am) skills that she can't do as of yet. We have always known that Caitlyn's forte was not in the area of physical skills. Gross motor skills took her forever to get and fine motor skills were on the iffy side. But in the grand scheme of things I have never really worried about these skills either. My focus has always been her cognitive and social/emotional development. Which she is performing outstanding in.

Then there was the ability to call 911. Now if you know my kid, you would think that she would know this. However, I have not taught her how to call the police precisely because I have no desire to have them show up on my doorstep for no reason in particular. And believe me, that is exactly what would happen. She loves the phone, in pure girl fashion. So I can't imagine teaching this to her and telling her that she is allowed to call in teh even of an emergency. My gut tells me that next semester when she receives her report card again, there will be a big fat "N" right next to the one that is there now.

So as a reward for doing so wonderfully, we went to Ceasarland tonight. It's nice to go there to have her burn off all the extra energy that builds up being stuck in the house all week because of the cold. On the other hand, there is the noise, germs, all the same things I mentioned in my McDonald Play Land post. Only intensified about 1000 times. We were there for no less than 3 painstaking hours. Of which I was able to read my book and completely ignore my child. Yes, I was "that" parent tonight.

Something I find truly amazing about being in places like that though.....how is it that with about 150 screaming kids, you can hear and distinguish your own child's scream or cry out of all of the others???? Does that mean that she has just done it so damn much that it is burned on my brain?

Anyhow...she had a splendid time. And she has the big old goose egg on her forehead to prove it. I didn't even know that she rammed her melon into another kid's until we were leaving and she told me about it. Again, I was "that" mother tonight.

The Anonymous Commentor

This is a mind boggling concept to me. I enjoy reading the blogs that I do, and on some I comment, others I just peruse. However, when I do comment, I always use my name and my information. If on the off chance that I don't, it's typically because I thought I was logged in. But leaving a comment on a person's blog and not identifying yourself? I don't understand this. What could the reason be?

I wonder mainly because I have had some of those anonymous commentors in the last few days. Now I have seen people comment anonymously and at times it because they are trolling and what they have to say is so offensive, and they are so aware of it's offensiveness, that they don't want to be associated with the comment that they are leaving. I guess I can understand that. To be just stirring the pot, to start a "commenting war." And to those people, I say comment anonymously because I really don't want to be bothered with you anyhow.

But then there are the people who really believe in the comment that they are leaving. I mean, after all, they put the effort into composing their thoughts, and put the energy into typing the words out. So why would they not want to be identified? Maybe I feel this way because I am a person that stands behind what I say, regardless of the reactions that it causes. That's not to say that I just spout off the first thing that comes to my head. I do have some control. But if I feel strongly about something, and create a comment about it, I recognize that it will not always be the most popular view, but it's mine none the less. Right? If I were to voice my opinion about hot topics like abortion or the death penalty or welfare reform, I would want to get credit for my own thoughts. So I just don't get the whole leaving an anonymous comment thing.

Another interesting thing about this....with technology today, regardless of anonymity, a person can be found out. Do people really think that they are anonomous on the internet? Cause I have found otherwise. I have a site meter on my blog. It tracks IP's and where people have been referred from. So I see where comments are coming from. All you really need to do is match the time of the comment with the referral, and viola! you have your commentor. So by claiming anonymity, all they really do is peak my interest and cause to me delve into it a little more.

The Green Eyed Monster

There is a Berenstein Bears book about a green eyed monster. Kelly read it to Caitlyn about a month ago. It scared the hell out of her. So it had to go in the garbage (didn't really, we just pretended) because that's what we did with The Grinch who Stole Christmas and she was no longer afraid of it. Well it didn't work as well as it did with the Grinch. Every now and again, she mentions that she is afraid of the green eyed monster. And naturally I assure her that there is no monster in this house that will harm her. For that matter, there are no monsters here.

Well the other day while we were at my mom's house, my mom threw a raging fit. She used to have them about every other day or so when I was a kid. I got used to them, and pretty much blew them off. Caitlyn is still learning about them. Though now mom really only has them about once a month or so. And now they are typically revolving around Kelly. Anyway, mom throws a fit. Caitlyn gets upset and starts crying. So I comfort her telling her that grandma is just really crabby and that in a few minutes she will stop and all will be well. Like clockwork, a few minutes later, mom is calm and life resumes to the norm in her house.

We get home, Cate gets in her jammies, and I read her a bedtime story. Sounds like the norm right? Wrong. Appearently this whole episode was still looming on her little brain. She looks at me and tells me that she doesn't like it when grandma yells like that. Well who does really? The woman looks, acts, and sounds like a damn lunatic. So we begin the discussion again that we had earlier. Then the girl starts sobbing. Can you see where this is going yet? I urge her to tell me what is bothering her so much. And she does just that.....

"When grandma yells like that she reminds me of the green eyed monster."

Needless to say, grandma now has a new nickname within the family. She hates it, but holy hell are we getting a good laugh out of it.

The interent is a funny thing

As is the world of blogging. The written word versus the spoken word can be two entirely different things, and have two completely different meanings. I don't frequent that many blogs. Most of the ones that I go to visit are people that have had preemies like myself, or ones that I have stumbled upon that peak my interest. I also don't have the time to view all of the blogs that I possibly could. There's just not enough time in my day for that, something to do with work, child, husband, etc.

So I visit a blog, I won't mention the name of it, I am sure you can figure out which one it is, and I leave a comment here and there when the topic tickles my fancy. I left a comment the other day that has generated significant amounts of traffic to my own little corner of the internet here. The comment that I made seems to have gotten some panties in a bunch. When I wrote the comment, I really had no intention of upsetting the masses, really only gave my opinion on a touchy subject. And POW!!!! I am being quoted on a few other blogs, by bloggers that also visit this particular blog.

I find it humorous that my one little sentence has been so horribly misconstrued and I am now an unfeeling bitch. Which, yeah I can be, but it's not the norm for me. Though there are a few other bloggers that have made comments to say that my own comment wasn't so horrible.

I think what irks me the most about it, is that for those I have upset, it is because I don't hold the same view as them. Yet I am quoted and called closed minded, ignorant, etc. All because my opinion differs vastly from theirs. Why is it horrible that I have a different opinion and am not afraid to state that opinion? Got me. Either or, my opinion is still the same on the subject and more than likely will not be changing any time in the near future.

On a lighter note, the mail from Barney that I previously mentioned....the plot has thickened. My cousin who used to own the video with the 1 800 number called the other day to talk to Caitlyn and pretend that she was Barney. (We tried calling the number on the video, and after 10 years or so, it is no longer in existence.) We figured that a call from Barney would be even better than a letter. Right???

Couldn't have been more wrong!!!

Not only is she wanting to call him every damn day now, but she thinks that because he called her, he is in fact going to be bringing a letter to her house ASAP. So, in true Nancy fashion, I have scoured the internet looking for a letter or something of the likes that can come from the purple dinosaur himself. With no such luck. So I contacted the Gods that control Barney's website. Only to be told that the fan club is no longer in existence. Which really sucks for me. Why on earth isn't it around anymore?? There are still kids that watch the damn dinosaur.

So now I have to do what I was trying to avoid. I am going to have to create a letter and mail it to her myself. I wanted to avoid doing this, don't ask me why. I just know that it would have been so much easier to find a website, enter all the pertinent information into the little fields provided, give a debit card number, and be on my way.

If anyone knows of a Barney website, or has been in touch with the purple dinosaur as of recently, please let me know so that he can write my kid a letter and we can resume to normal activities in this house.

Mail from Barney

Caitlyn has been watching a Barney Christmas video the last few nights before bed. I have never watched it with her. It's actually one of Tutti's from when she was Caitlyn's age. So the previews that are on it, I have to assume, are quite old. But she is like me and loves previews so we don't fast forward through them.

So last night as Matt is putting her to bed (yes that is a shocker in and of itself) I hear her say to him....

"Daddy, did you know that if we call 1-800 we can get a letter from Barney?"

Pod People

I am starting to believe that they do in fact exist. You see, I believe this now becuase I think that my child is one of them. I have not come to this conclusion lightly. Yes, she has been abducted and in her place they have left me an obedient and compliant child.

She is eating anything that I put in front of her, and even asking for more food.

She is going to bed without any difficulties and not getting out of bed for any reasons after I have put her in there.

She is constantly wanting to snuggle and kiss and hug me.

At the end of her bath when I told her it was time to get out, she eagerly obliged and stood up without my having to beg and plead with her.

There is MINIMAL whinning going on in my house, which typically occurs every 7-9 minutes around our abode.

Yes all of these things are wonderful. But they are not the norm for Caitlyn.

Where is my child???? What have they done with the obstinate being that I have grown so very accustomed to???? Man I hope she is ok and happy wherever she is, because honestly, I think I want to keep the one that I have now.

A nice "snoozing" bath

To the rest of the world, it's referred to as a nice soothing bath.

In Caitlynese, it's called a nice "snoozing" bath. She doesn't quite have some of the consonent blend sound just yet. Though she tries. When I picked her up at mom's today, she wanted to know if she could in fact that a nice snoozing bath. And that's just what she did. Only in the world of Caitlyn, a bath is really anything but soothing. It's more like a torrential downpour in the bathroom that is caused by her attempting to swim like a mermaid. Cause she can do that you know? She even holds her legs together real tight because mermaids don't have 2 legs. Just ask her, she'll tell you.

Shingles, bleeding to death, and the flu

What could they possibly have in common you ask? The answer really is simple.....ME!!!

Here is a basic rundown of the last 4 weeks of my life (January can not end soon enough)

Demeber 24th...diagnosed with shingles

....pain continues through the end of December

December 31st...begin bleeding to death

.....bleeding continues until approximately January 15th

January 16th...wake up with cough and stuffy head

....continues to present day

Now just because I stated that the pain of the shingles lasted through the end of December does not mean that they have cleared up. Cause you see, when the doctor said that they last about 4-6 weeks, turns out she really wasn't lying to me. Not that I thought that she was. But I did think that she was over reacting, being cautious. Now I am realizing that she really meant it. Cause you see, although the pain has subsided, and the lesions (ewwww) have disappeared, they linger to make my life hell. How can that be? Well, by waking me up at all hours of the night because they itch like fucking crazy. when I say "they" I really am speaking of nothing, as there is nothing there. But my skin itches. And nothing I do helps to subside the itching.

The cold and flu I can deal with...when I have just that. But paired with the other shit, no fun at all really.

Nancy's solution.....drug induced coma. No really. Take a little Benadyl, add in some Vicodin, then for shits and giggles, take some Niquil gel tabs. And I am sleeping like a baby. Healthy? Eh? I highly doubt it. But neither is only getting about 2.5 hours of sleep a night either.

So either I am going to become a drug addicted mother, or I am willing all of these ailments away. Not for me to decide appearently since I have learned that I have no control whatsoever over these damn shingles.

Moral of the story.....Shingles are in fact the devil.

Awesome

THIS has got to be the best blonde joke ever. And something like this is really only made possible through the amazing world of blogging ;)

Dad's Blood Pressure

It's funny to me to think about how much kids observe, but don't let on to how much they really know. By this I mean, how much they really know about what is going on in mom and dad's lives. Despite our best efforts to keep ugliness away from them, they pick up on it. Either by the tones of our voices, or the little things they hear us say. But none the less, we, as parents, believe that we are hiding things from them. When in fact, they are picking up on more than we could ever imagine.

Matt was gone yesterday from early in the morning until 2am this morning. So Caitlyn didn't see him all day. Now typically, I don't think much about how much she is missing him, as usually she won't even bat an eyelash about where he is. She just assumes that he is at work. And if she doubts me, all I have to do is find a football game on TV and she is convinced that he is in fact working.

When I was putting Caitlyn to bed, she started to cry. Here is the conversation that ensued....

N: What's the matter baby?

C: When is Daddy coming home?

N: He will be home soon sweetie. And when he does get home, I will have him come in and give you some lovin.

C: But what if he didn't eat dinner mommy?

N: I am sure he ate at work.

C: But if he doesn't eat dinner, his blood pressure will go low. And he doesnt' have any peanut butter to eat to make him better.

.....side note: Matt is a diabetic. What she was attempting to refer to is that his blood sugar will go low if he hasnt' eaten dinner. When we are at home and he starts to drop, I typically give him a PB&J sandwich or simply hand him the peanut butter jar to take a few spoonfuls of. Always does the trick

N: I promise you baby, he ate while he was at work and he will be just fine.

C: Make sure that Daddy wakes me up when he gets home mommy.

This to me is so amazing. First of all that she has listened when I say to Matt, "are you going low?" or "have you eaten dinner?" or "I think you need to test." And the fact that she knows how to fix it!! There are times that he has gone low when he is home alone with her. And he has always had sense enough to call me or someone in the family to walk him through how to make it better. And there have been times where I have worried that it could happen and he could pass out and then what? So it puts my mind at ease a little bit that Caitlyn would in fact know how to help her Daddy should she notice that he is going low. She has said to me at times when we are home that she thinks he is low. And usually she is right on the money.

....side note again: Matt's behavior changes so dramatically that it is hard for anyone who knows him to NOT know that he is going low.

The second thing that is amazing to me, is just how empathetic my little girl is. I am so awed by the fact that she cares so much about her Daddy. This is not to say that I didn't know that she loved him, because of course I know that. But for her, at only 4 years old, to be so concerned about his well being is amazing to me. It basically lets me know just what kind of adult my little girl will grow up to be, and it is a person that I know I can, and will, be proud of :)

Guns

So how do I handle this one....Caitlyn is now making guns out of her blocks and playing with them as if they are in fact guns. Now I am not one of those moms that is crazy gung ho about "NO GUNS EVER"!!! We don't keep one in the house, she has never been in contact with one, and she has never been in a house that has had one. So it is obvious where she learned about them...TV and/or school....the 2 most obvious culprits and demons right LOL.

So here is my dilemma, I don't want to tell her that she can't play with a toy gun. Cause after all, it is only a toy. When she has played with water guns in my moms pool we have discussed the proper use of them and that you never shoot it at someone's face, etc. But is there really any harm in playing with a gun in her own bedroom? I don't think it's going to make her become a serial killer in her adult years. If that were to happen it would more than likely be something that I did to warp her not a toy gun right? I mean is it really a big deal to let a kid play with a toy gun? When we are out and about at other people's houses and things, I hear parents telling their kids "No guns" "We don't play with guns." Well, we had guns in my house growing up and we knew that you didn't play with those guns but we could play with our guns from our toy boxes.

So I am thinking as long as the word "play" is involved with the toy guns that she is using that makes it ok?

She is sick

And that just adds to the fun that is going on in my house these days. Fever came last night, puking came this morning, along with coughing and a runny nose. There is an upside to this though, hard to believe, I know, but there is one. She has been taking her medicine like a champ!! So wonderfully in fact, that I am convinced someone has taken my child and replaced her with a pod person. There has been no arguing, no puking as a result of the medicine, no wrestling to get the shit in her mouth. I tell her it's time to take it, and she tells me she wants to do it on my bed cause that's where it's easiest. Whatever the hell works for you girlie I will do. And she takes it, all of it, with no arguing. I am in awe.

My friends the shingles are still lingering. I am calling them friends now because they have been here for so long that I feel I have gotten to know them. However, they are somewhat like house guests that have over stayed their fucking welcome. I mean really now, it has been 3 weeks, and I am still having issues with them. All of the "lesion" (as my doc calls them, which grosses me way out) have gone. However, they did leave behind a present, cause why wouldn't they? I know itch like crazy everywhere that there was a lesion. Sounds simple. However, when I scratch them, they burn like hell. Or, when I scratch them, I get no relief because the areas that the lesions were in are now numb. So needless to say, there is no relief whatsoever for me. Matt tells me to put some lotion on them. Well hello asshole, I can't reach the spot on my back that they were on so how exactly am I supposed to accomplish that feat. Yes I am flexible, but I am no contortionist.

So what do I do you ask? Well it's simple really. I take vicodin. Cause I have learned that not only does it take away pain, it also takes away itchiness. Well at least I think it does. I may just be so hopped up on the shit that I am thinking it does when it fact it does not.

On top of that, I am having some female issues that I won't be going too much into detail about. But I am assuming that you can figure out what region on my body that pertains to. I will be calling my doctor tomorrow because quite frankly, I am surprised that I have not yet bled to death.

Neglectful Blogger here

What a horrific month I have had.

Right before Christmas, I noticed some blotches on my skin. Thinking nothing of it, I rubbed some lotion on it and went about my business. The next day, I ended up with a sore back. Again, thinking nothing of it, I had assumed that it was from moving the new couch that was delivered. I even went for a massage on the 23rd thinking that I pulled a muscle. I always had loads of last minute crap to do so I figured I would get the massage and be able to go about my business.

Christmas Eve I wake up sobbing in pain. I tell Matt that he needs to put some sports cream on my back and give me a rub down so that I can finish up the last minute shoppping, wrap all of Caitlyn's gifts, and do all the fun night before Christmas stuff with my girl. As soon as Matt pulls up my shirt, we knew there was something more than a pulled muscle going on. He tells me that I have more of those spots on my back now.

I call my doctor because I immediately think that I know what it is. Shingles. I tell her I just need a pain reliever so that I can do the holiday thing and then I will see her right after Christmas. No such luck. She insists I go to the emergency room. (I had another medical issue going on at the same time, but won't be going into that at all.) Fucking Christmas Eve and the ER??? Are you kidding me??? But there is some light to this story. I was actually in and our of there in under an hour.
Doctor comes in. Pronounces that I am the proud new owner of shingles. Gives me an antiviral medication and some pain killers and sends me on my way. Why in and out in under an hour you ask? Well of course it is because shingles is airborn to those who have not had chicken pox. So luckily, I was considered to be highly contagious in their eyes and they didn't want me around any of their sick people.

So here we are about 3 weeks later and I am still in pain. Though not nearly as much as I was in when this little disease decided to first grace my door step. But it is still there none the less. I have been told that it takes 4-6 weeks for it to clear up. Cause I only have a mild to moderate case, otherwise it would take longer.

The new couch comes today

After 7 years, we finally bit the bullet and went out and bought a new couch. The old one we had was pretty cheap and was literally falling apart. Having a 4 year old jumping on it didn't help matters out much. It was also much to small for the living room that we have now. It worked fine in the condo, but not in this house....nor did it match the walls I painted last year.

So we will see if the delivery guys actually show up in the "window" that they have given me.

My girl made me so sad tonight

This morning when I was getting ready for work, Caityn was very upset that I had work and she didn't have school. She was crying horribly saying that she wanted to stay home with me today. Now normally, I would say to hell with work, and do some stuff from home and hang out with her all day. But I absolutely couldn't today. There were things that I had to get done and I had to be in the office to accomplish them. So I promised her that we would go to Chuck E Cheese's after work with Kelly and she felt a little better. Okay, ALOT better...I am so not beneath bribery with this child.

So I get her from my mom and off we go. And she is loving every minute of it. However, this glee was quickly marred. See we still struggle every now and again with pooping on the potty. But I can't remember the last time she had an accident....you can completely see where this is going no?

I witness her doing the pooping dance. This consists of her sitting down wherever she is at and bouncing her legs. Or as she is running, she is holding her ass. To the commoner, it looks like nothing out of the ordinary. To the trained eye of the mother of this child, I know full well what is going to occur. So I ask several times if she needs to take care of business in the bathroom. And of course she reassures me that I have nothing at all to worry about.

So the time comes to leave. I am just about to put her coat on and when I turn to face her, she has her pants around her ankles. For a split second, I actually giggle, then it dawns on me what she is doing. She is looking to see if there is in fact poop in her pants. And what do you think I saw...yes....poop. I quickly yank her pants back up and I am fuming....and she knows it. She asks me to take her in the bathroom and I tell her no can do, have no spares with me. Will clean you up when we get home.

So now she starts sobbing....screaming....people are looking. But it's okay you see, because they think that she is crying because she doesnt want to leave. Nothing looks out of the ordinary. And I am refraining from looking at her or speaking to her. Because I know then that the scene will look anything but ordinary. There will be a maniacal mother at Chuck E Cheese and innocent children don't need to see that.

We proceed to the car, she proceeds to tell me how badly it smells...I know, I have a nose, you don't have to tell me. And I continue to tell her that we will discuss it when we get home. Mostly because I don't want her to be embarrassed in front of Kelly. she keeps on asking me if I am mad and I keep on telling her that we aren't talking about it until we get home.

Then she pulls this beauty out of thin air.......

"You're mad at me because you don't want me anymore."

To say the least I was fucking shocked. Where on earth would she ever come up with that??? I don't think I have ever said anyting even remotely close to that to this child. The only thing that I can think of is that it is something that Kelly has mentioned to her. (Side note and brief synopsis...Kelly has been given up by her mother, adopted by a family, given back to foster home by that family as they said they couldn't handle her, lived in foster home a couple of years, now living with my mother.) So I am thinking that somewhere along the last few months, Kelly has mentioned being bad, not being wanted, and being given away. Makes sense right???

So we get home, I clean her up, and tell her how disappointed I am that she did it. Then we proceed to the couch to have a talk about what she said. No need to go into details, I am sure you can imagine what was said....I would never give you away, I love you, etc. The entire time, she sobbed. As if she was so sure that I really didn't want her.

So now, mom feels like shit, girl feels better. I didn't even have to bribe her to make her feel better about the whole situation either....so we all win!

Sick sick people on this planet

Since adding this sitemeter to this blog, I am oftren unnerved by what people google. I won't go into details about that, since that's not what this entry is about. But believe me, some of the things are freakish. And what's worse is that the words they are searching I have actually typed in here somewhere.

But I digress.

Today my friend Shelley discovered by chance that some sick fuck is using pictures of her truly adorable son Jacob and passing them off as photos of her own child. Now, Jacob is a preemie, a 25 weeker like Caitlyn. And what amazes me, besides the fact that she has taken these images, is that she wants peolpe to believe that she is currently going through the hell of having a micro preemie. She is saying that her sons (twins) are 23 weekers. See it's this whole preemier than thou issue, hers must be older. Despite the fact that they aren't even her kids. I find it so hard to believe that anyone would want sympathy, or empathy, based solely on the fact that their child is so gravely ill that he may die???? Anyone who has had a preemie would never wish that experience of the NICU on their worst enemies. (well maybe their worst, but no one else I assure you) The idea that she is glorifying and trying to capitalize on people's emotions based on an ill child is truly inconcievable to me. When you have a child as sick as a 25 weeker, you want nothing more than normalcy. Is that true for the opposite as well? That when you have a healthy baby, you want nothing more than the "fame" of having a 25 weeker??? My gut tells me no.

So here are the pics that she is posting. The first is Shelley's son Jacob and the second...well I have no idea who that baby is. If you recognize it, alert the mother that she is claiming this child to be her own!

Sick sick people in this world!

Let it snow.....

Famous Words of Caitlyn
It has been snowing here for about 6 hours now. And it is finally starting to slow down. I have already shovelled once...my back now loves me to bits. Tomorrow morning, Matt is on duty to remove what has accumulated since I last did it.

On a side note....never allow a 4 year old to shovel with you. It is their goal in life to fill the empty spots with snow. Just ask Caitlyn, she will tell you that she was "filling the holes I was making." Nice.

I love my job, I love my job, I love my job......

So one of the duties of my job is to do after school classes or trainings for school districts. So there is one district in particular, they have no interest in Assistive Technology whatsoever. And the worst part about it is that they are the people that need it the most...doesn't it always work that way.

So I go to this school (which will remain unnamed as I have heard of people losing their jobs because of things they have placed on their blogs) to do an inservice of an overview of assistive technology. Mind you, much of the preparation has really already been done since I have done it far too many times that I care to count. But I typicallly personalize it for that district; what kinds of students they work with, staff's abilities with technology, and what is already in the district that they have to work with. So there is some planning and prep time that is involved in it, all be it minimal.

Inservice is slated to begin at 3:00. Which means teachers will get there by 3:07. As I sit here and write this now, it is nearing 3:30....NO ONE has come. It's almost as though I threw a party and no one decided to be there. At first I felt guilty, but hey, I get paid regardless. And when you as a teacher can't provide what a student needs and the parents come marching into the next IEP with lawyers and advocates they better not come crying to me...cause I offered and they didn't take me up on it. I have even had the secretary make an announcement that I am sitting in here,....still no takers!

So I will sit here until I am supposed to. All by myself. And just keep reminding myself that I really do love my job.

Weddings

I really love weddings. And I always make sure that I go to the ceremony and not just the reception. Seeing as that really is the most important part of the day. Matt and I attended a wedding on Saturday for one of his assistant coaches. See we had to be there cause Matt has to do the "networking" thing. Here's my beef (besides the fact that I couldn't find anything to wear in my closet that would cover up my ginormous breasts, but that is another post in and of itself)....

My invitation said the ceremony was to start at 5pm. They were getting married in the hall where the reception was to be held. Now the place where this was ocurring was about 45 minutes away from our house. So we left at 3:45 as we needed to stop and buy a card cause I never do that early. We arrive at the hall at about 4:45pm and sit in the car for a few minutes signing the car and writing the check out for the happy couple. We enter the hall at abou 5:53 and find seats. Several people arrive after us, and even more arrive after them.

Now, I can understand a wedding beginning a few minutes after it is supposed to. I can even understand it beginning 15020 minutes after it is supposed to. However, to start a wedding at 6:05pm that was slated to start at 5:00????? Well I'm sorry, but I think that is just fucking ignorant. We were sitting on this little chairs that were all placed to close to each other. So you could hardly move. And everytime you did move, you felt as though the damn chair was going to break under the stress of holding up adult sized asses.

Suffice it to say, by the time the ceremony began, Nancy was a very cranky girl.

Was a nice wedding, but marred by the insanity of the whole hour and 5 minutes late thing.

Now I know why I am never on time for things!