Sunday, January 27, 2008

Nothing wrong with the belly

So the night before I took Cate to the doctor, I had a long talk with her about this whole stomach thing. She finally confessed, through some serious tears, that she was making up some of the stories about the stomach aches. My heart broke to see how upset she was over doing this. After some discussion, she said that she was saying it because she misses me when she is at school. However, she said that there are times that her tummy hurts that she wasn't making up. So I told her we would still go to the doctor just to make sure that she was in fact ok. But I was fairly certain that they could be attributed to her being upset from missing me and from not eating her lunch.

The doctor did a lot of poking and pushing on her belly and finally settled on having a urine test done. At the doctor's mention of her having to pee in a cup, I thought she was going to vomit. She couldn't even fathom doing it. But I got her in the bathroom stall and it worked out fine. The results were all normal. We got her sucker and left for home.

An interesting thing happened while we were in the office though. I was chatting with the doctor about how her health has been (this is a doctor that is relatively new to the practice and he is always completely amazed by her, so much so that I think at times he is using her as some kind of study). While he and I were chatting, Caitlyn was facing me and had her back to the doc and she whispered, "Please don't tell him about my lie Mommy." She had the most unbelievable look of desperation on her face. It was as though she was so mortified that this little lie of hers had gotten to this point. I assured her that I wouldn't and the doc and I continued to talk for a few more minutes before departing. When we left the exam room, I asked Cate to wait in the waiting room while I spoke to the doctor. I told him that the reason I brought her here today was to make sure all was well, but that the complaints she was making were for attention. He made sure to tell me that if I needed more help with the situation that I could call the office and they would help me. Man I love my pediatrician's office!!

Needless to say, there was a lot of talking going on about how missing me is no reason to say she is sick. Nor is wanting to leave school a valid reason. And the strangest thing about it all is that she isn't away from me for that long during the day. I drop her at my mom's about an hour before I have to be at work and she is picked up within 2 hours of her getting out of school. But either way, she needs more mom time that she is currently getting.

Here's what we did to fix the situation:
1. We pulled out the calendar and set up days in February that will be Mommy Daughter days only. She suggested going to the mall for ice cream and chat. I can certainly agree to that.
2. We picked one day that I get out of work early that she doesn't get out of school early, for me to pick her up at school. We are going to make a craft together that day.
3. We are meeting with her teacher on Tuesday afternoon so that we can talk to her teacher about some things she can do when she feels as though she is missing me.

Hopefully this will get nipped in the bud quickly. I am starting to think that it may be a developmental thing. I remember when I was about 5 years old, my mom always seemed to be working. I can remember walking to my aunt's house one day, she was babysitting us, and I cried the whole way there with my brother because I just wanted to be home with my mom. So maybe it is just a phase that she is going through. But whatever it is, I know that I can't dismiss it. Nor can I allow it to consume the both of us either. I'm not saying that she is being manipulative, but she certainly hs the ability to be, and I have to make sure that she isn't just playing me too much.

Hopefully the discussion with her teacher will be really good and we can get through this as painlessly as possible.

1 comment:

a very tired mommy said...

glad to hear that there is nothing wrong with the little girlie!

i like your ideas of getting some good one-on-one with her! I should try that with my own kids....